Paul has been working in the ER this month and somehow got a ridiculous number of shifts and terribly long hours (somehow they were short-staffed this month). We thought we’d be looking forward to this month, but it didn’t turn out to be so.
As for me, I started working for my dad and part of my job entails managing a feed store about an hour and 45 minutes from here. I only go to the store a couple of days a week and then manage some things from home. Its great that Finn can go to work with me and I can work from home with him, but I’m having a hard time finding the balance of work and making sure I give him time. I think I’ll feel less guilty when I can get him in a mother’s day out program a couple of days a week so that I have dedicated work time, but for now, I struggle with the guilt.
Fortunately, the job allows for some flexibility. When Paul is off on a Monday, I can get some work done on a Sunday and then take some family time with him. Considering residency hours, the odd schedules, and the little time we get together, this flexibility is invaluable.
The main lesson I’ve learned in residency, at least for intern year, is to take it one month at a time. Just get through the month. One month, I may have no time alone, we may rarely see Paul, but then the next it may be better. Or, it may be bad for two months, but taking it one month at a time helps. We can all hang in for a month.
Paul is working hard. He’s tired. He gets frustrated not having any control of his own schedule. Understandably, it difficult to be unable to plan a day off. His vacation only comes in week long blocks so he can’t make sure he has a Saturday off to throw Finn’s birthday party or go to his cousin’s wedding. I think that has been one of the most difficult things for us to become accustomed to. Certainly, he wasn’t in control in medical school either, but the hours weren’t as bad and it didn’t feel nearly as difficult to take a day off.
Only 4 years and 9 months left. And then we may be able to feel a little in control again. But who’s counting? ME!